:(
went to cheryth FIRST birthday today! She's really cuteeee. haha. the innocence of little babies are really precious. as we grow and learn, our minds will be corrupted by reality (to a certain extent. haha).
These few days weren't really happy ones. bf is goin to work everyday for two months. yeah.. two months only what. so what. it'll be a reallly good experience as well. good for his future. good to earn more money. basically it's a good opportunity. yupp. i really understand this. but. it doesnt mean i accept it. was really sad over it. his weekends are alrdy gone. now taking up another job. no more weekdays as well. suan le barh. just let him do whatever he wants. i couldnt care more. i dont want to bother as well. wo hen lei.
whatever. i'll survive anyway. things are changing. in ways he didnt realise. these changes are pretty scary actually. they may be small little ones. but as time passes by, it'll become really bad and serious. i dont know. i really dont know.
he said he'll acc me when he knocks off. i dont see the point. he'll be really tired. he'll be falling aslp every now and then. i cant even talk to him properly. no point coming over and rushin hm cos he got to wake up early the next day. so what if he took off days during the impt days. somehow i still feel different. nvm. maybe i am asking for too much. but all i wanted was just more time tgt. maybe it's really too much. :(
I aint a good gf. i am selfish.i am ugly. i am not understanding enough. i suck. whatever.
i've decided to let things be. I'll get use to everything. things will be fine.
by the time he's done with his new job, my sch reopens. how cool is that.
oh oh. i know. i can look for a job as well to keep myself occupied right. it's not that i didnt look for one. but the ones offered aint my cup of tea. i have been looking since may. and my hol ends in aug. now is alrdy close to mid june. sigh.. du lao shi said if i dont have the need to work, might as well just stay hm. but i wanna earn extra bucks in the meantime also eh. so contradicting. i know. thats why i say i suck. haha. so vexed. somebody tell me what to do? sigh.
can i have a pill that will stop my brain from thinking fr awhile? or maybe before i slp. so that i can slp fast and 'peacefully'.
ps: i just want to be happy again.
These few days weren't really happy ones. bf is goin to work everyday for two months. yeah.. two months only what. so what. it'll be a reallly good experience as well. good for his future. good to earn more money. basically it's a good opportunity. yupp. i really understand this. but. it doesnt mean i accept it. was really sad over it. his weekends are alrdy gone. now taking up another job. no more weekdays as well. suan le barh. just let him do whatever he wants. i couldnt care more. i dont want to bother as well. wo hen lei.
whatever. i'll survive anyway. things are changing. in ways he didnt realise. these changes are pretty scary actually. they may be small little ones. but as time passes by, it'll become really bad and serious. i dont know. i really dont know.
he said he'll acc me when he knocks off. i dont see the point. he'll be really tired. he'll be falling aslp every now and then. i cant even talk to him properly. no point coming over and rushin hm cos he got to wake up early the next day. so what if he took off days during the impt days. somehow i still feel different. nvm. maybe i am asking for too much. but all i wanted was just more time tgt. maybe it's really too much. :(
I aint a good gf. i am selfish.i am ugly. i am not understanding enough. i suck. whatever.
i've decided to let things be. I'll get use to everything. things will be fine.
by the time he's done with his new job, my sch reopens. how cool is that.
oh oh. i know. i can look for a job as well to keep myself occupied right. it's not that i didnt look for one. but the ones offered aint my cup of tea. i have been looking since may. and my hol ends in aug. now is alrdy close to mid june. sigh.. du lao shi said if i dont have the need to work, might as well just stay hm. but i wanna earn extra bucks in the meantime also eh. so contradicting. i know. thats why i say i suck. haha. so vexed. somebody tell me what to do? sigh.
can i have a pill that will stop my brain from thinking fr awhile? or maybe before i slp. so that i can slp fast and 'peacefully'.
ps: i just want to be happy again.
posted by Viv ♥ at
8:05:00 PM
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